Bad Parenting or Surviving?
Today was one of those days. Actually no, this afternoon/evening was just one of those days, but it was long and torturous enough that we will say it was an entire day.
Before I explain why today was so delightful let's rewind. Lately, Michael has not wanted to sleep in his room. He has been clingy at night not wanting us to leave, and I get it. He has become more clingy the closer we have gotten to the new baby which is totally understandable, but it has made bedtime a battle, pretty much my least favorite time of the day. We started letting him keep the door open so he could hear us and to practice for when he is potty trained and needs to get up in the night. For a few days this worked. He would wander out, but usually he would go back to bed. Except he started coming in our room early in the morning, coming earlier and earlier each day... it was still dark outside. And the wouldnt go back to sleep, which that combined with his general dislike of naps made for delightful days. And then a few days ago he decided he was done with his room. He would cry, until he was almost throwing up, and beg to sleep in our bed or on the couch with us. The first night we gave in, the next night we battled with him and i slept in his bed (not fun when you are this pregnant), and then we were tired and defeated. Now we have compromised, he can sleep in a sleeping bag on our floor. Not in the bed, but the floor, he says he is camping. Not my favorite solution, but the battle was awful, and exhausting, and really probably not worth it. He is 2 I am sure he will go back to his room eventually, and a brother can be traumatizing I'm sure.
So now that you understand the fun let's get to the bad parenting. So bedtime has been pretty late the past few days, what with the battling. And today naps didnt happen, he just refused. So by 430 he was a mess. I had started dinner earlier and had every intention of finishing it and having a delicious dinner by by 445 not so much. So i packed Michael in the car let him choose where we went (he chose Sonic) ordered breakfast burritos and ice cream for dinner, came home, ate, and he went to bed. I feel almost as if I rewarded his fit and bad behavior, but then again I feel like one more minute of screaming may have killed me. So i am torn, but not really. I think there are moments in parenting where we have to decide wheither to judge our actions as just plain bad parenting or surviving the tough moments. Would it have been better if I forced him to go along with the original plan? maybe but it probably wouldnt have made a difference. did the eggy burritos and ice cream kill us? nope. did it result in less screaming and an overall happier mom and child, heck yes.
Before I explain why today was so delightful let's rewind. Lately, Michael has not wanted to sleep in his room. He has been clingy at night not wanting us to leave, and I get it. He has become more clingy the closer we have gotten to the new baby which is totally understandable, but it has made bedtime a battle, pretty much my least favorite time of the day. We started letting him keep the door open so he could hear us and to practice for when he is potty trained and needs to get up in the night. For a few days this worked. He would wander out, but usually he would go back to bed. Except he started coming in our room early in the morning, coming earlier and earlier each day... it was still dark outside. And the wouldnt go back to sleep, which that combined with his general dislike of naps made for delightful days. And then a few days ago he decided he was done with his room. He would cry, until he was almost throwing up, and beg to sleep in our bed or on the couch with us. The first night we gave in, the next night we battled with him and i slept in his bed (not fun when you are this pregnant), and then we were tired and defeated. Now we have compromised, he can sleep in a sleeping bag on our floor. Not in the bed, but the floor, he says he is camping. Not my favorite solution, but the battle was awful, and exhausting, and really probably not worth it. He is 2 I am sure he will go back to his room eventually, and a brother can be traumatizing I'm sure.
So now that you understand the fun let's get to the bad parenting. So bedtime has been pretty late the past few days, what with the battling. And today naps didnt happen, he just refused. So by 430 he was a mess. I had started dinner earlier and had every intention of finishing it and having a delicious dinner by by 445 not so much. So i packed Michael in the car let him choose where we went (he chose Sonic) ordered breakfast burritos and ice cream for dinner, came home, ate, and he went to bed. I feel almost as if I rewarded his fit and bad behavior, but then again I feel like one more minute of screaming may have killed me. So i am torn, but not really. I think there are moments in parenting where we have to decide wheither to judge our actions as just plain bad parenting or surviving the tough moments. Would it have been better if I forced him to go along with the original plan? maybe but it probably wouldnt have made a difference. did the eggy burritos and ice cream kill us? nope. did it result in less screaming and an overall happier mom and child, heck yes.
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