Waiting to meet you

As we get closer and closer to Zach arriving I am getting more and more nervous about what his personality will be like. You know what it is like to meet a new person, there is a part of you that seriously wonders if they are going to like you, and wonders what they will be like. Well that's how I feel about Zach. I felt the same way about Mikey, I was anxious to know what he would look like and what he would be like. And as I think and stress about it (because clearly that is by far the healthiest and most productive option) I have been thinking. I think we are given the children we are because that is what we need, not always what we can handle, boy are there days when I can't handle Mikey, but they are what we need for whatever reason. For example, I think that we are so blessed with a 2 year old that talks... in complete sentences because a 2 year old that used one or two word phrases or didnt talk would make me crazy. Zach might be that way, but there is no way that I would be able to handle that with the first one. And we have been so blessed with a busy but focused 2 year old because I wouldnt have been able to handle anything else the first time. He asks for school activities, he likes to do chores (ok only some chores), and he needs and loves routine, another child, one that was less structured would have made me crazy and would have made me really nervous about having a second. There are also things about his personality that force me to grow, Mikey loves to be cuddled, and I am not a cuddly person so several times a day he will come up and remind me that he needs a hug, without these gentle, and sometimes less gentle reminders I might not think about it as often, and I do need to. He also constantly asks questions, forcing me to look at the world from his perspective and to take the time to slow down enough to come up with a way to explain life to him.

Mikey has been awesome and it makes me wonder what his brother will be like. It makes me wonder how much of who there are is just them, and how much is shaped by the world they live in. I wonder how similar these two boys will be. Will they be polar opposites, or will they be similar? will they be the best of friends or enemies? oh i am nervous.