The MOMS Club- Best or Lamest Thing Ever?
So I've been thinking about this post for a long time, wouldn't it be great it that meant it was going to be amazing and well written- well fail. And it's possible that I've posted on this topic before, though I can't find it so who the heck knows. So here's the thing, the MOMS Club (yep that's that it is actually called), it's time to write about it, especially if I view this as a form of family history because over the last three years that group has become such a big part of our lives.
So the story begins in March 2014. We moved to Austin, and while we were thrilled about the exciting new opportunity, I hadn't quite anticipated how hard moving with two little ones was going to be. I hadn't really thought about what an adjustment life with two would be let alone life with two in a new place. For some reason I thought we would resume life as how it had been but with two, while this was pretty much true for the third one, it was certainly not true with the second. He was a great baby but we were in a new place and I had a toddler who was used to getting out and having friends and all of a sudden we had... no one. We tried making friends at church, and thinking about how badly that went is still painfully embarrassing. Let's leave it at that did not go well. So now we really had no friends and we were a little (ok a lot) embarrassed at our failed attempts. And then somehow we stumbled across the MOMS Club. The MOMS Club isn't as lame as it sounds. Actually for us it was a lifesaver (probably not literally). The MOMS Club (which I wholeheartedly think needs a cooler name) is a group of mothers that get together to offer one another support and let the kids play. If you are familiar with the LDS church you might want to think of it a bit like a volunteer Relief Society minus the spiritual aspect. So I contacted the local MOMS Club chapter and I was so embarrassed, it seemed humiliating that I couldn't make friends at church so I had to reach out to these people to beg them to be my friend. In hindsight that reaction was a bit dramatic but I think there may have been some postpartum issues clouding my mind at the time. I heard back from the group almost immediately, and their response wasn't "hey we already have friends" it is was "here's our calendar we are thrilled to meet you!". The first thing we went to was a lecture by a pediatric dentist. We got lost on the way, all three of us were crying, I almost just drove home, but we dried off the tears and went in, and they were so friendly. They were looking out for us- they were excited to meet us! I remember Michael taking a snack while we were there and just being so upset with him and telling him no those snacks are for the invited kids. Looking back i think who cares that he took a snack, that is exactly why there were snacks, but after those first few disastrous attempts with church playgroups I was a bit wary. The kids, all the kids not just mine, were losing their crap at this meeting with the dentist. Luckily it was in the sanctuary of a church with a super deep baptismal font (yeah not luckily) so they were able to destroy quite a few items, but the moms were ok with it. Sure they did save a few lives and keep the kids from destroying the church too much but they were relaxed, some were even in sweatpants. We left that first meeting optimistic. We went to the easter egg hunt a few weeks later and that pretty much cemented us joining. We met a mom with three little boys who all went ballistic, met one of the members of the board who arrived late and was ok with it. All the people were friendly and remembered us, no one acted like they were too busy, or we were imposing. SO we joined. Sure over time the politics of the group made itself apparent, and yes there are days where people are less friendly than they should be (including us), but for the most part this has been great for us. You dont join something as lame as the MOMS Club unless your purpose is to make friends, after almost three years we have made friends, we enjoy the activities, and when we continue to fail at making friends at church that is ok.
The other day I dropped off a dinner (fail) to one of the members of the group that recently had a baby. When one of the members has a baby we send out a calendar and provide her family with dinner. I was so impressed at how quickly the calendar filled up- it took maybe two hours for seven slots to be filled. This isnt a group with a religious affiliation, without the group none of these people would have met but when they are asked to offer up service many respond right away. Granted no one wants to serve on the board but dinner after a baby- we got this. And it's refreshing. It's refreshing that there arent cliques (maybe there are and I'm oblivious), it's refreshing that the reason people are there is to be friends. It is just is, and may it is because I think making friends as a grown up is hard, and making friends with kids is even harder. So there's my rambling post. If for some reason you find yourself moving to a strange city and you are struggling to make friends join the MOMS Club. It sounds lame, but they will pull you out of your house and want to see you.
So the story begins in March 2014. We moved to Austin, and while we were thrilled about the exciting new opportunity, I hadn't quite anticipated how hard moving with two little ones was going to be. I hadn't really thought about what an adjustment life with two would be let alone life with two in a new place. For some reason I thought we would resume life as how it had been but with two, while this was pretty much true for the third one, it was certainly not true with the second. He was a great baby but we were in a new place and I had a toddler who was used to getting out and having friends and all of a sudden we had... no one. We tried making friends at church, and thinking about how badly that went is still painfully embarrassing. Let's leave it at that did not go well. So now we really had no friends and we were a little (ok a lot) embarrassed at our failed attempts. And then somehow we stumbled across the MOMS Club. The MOMS Club isn't as lame as it sounds. Actually for us it was a lifesaver (probably not literally). The MOMS Club (which I wholeheartedly think needs a cooler name) is a group of mothers that get together to offer one another support and let the kids play. If you are familiar with the LDS church you might want to think of it a bit like a volunteer Relief Society minus the spiritual aspect. So I contacted the local MOMS Club chapter and I was so embarrassed, it seemed humiliating that I couldn't make friends at church so I had to reach out to these people to beg them to be my friend. In hindsight that reaction was a bit dramatic but I think there may have been some postpartum issues clouding my mind at the time. I heard back from the group almost immediately, and their response wasn't "hey we already have friends" it is was "here's our calendar we are thrilled to meet you!". The first thing we went to was a lecture by a pediatric dentist. We got lost on the way, all three of us were crying, I almost just drove home, but we dried off the tears and went in, and they were so friendly. They were looking out for us- they were excited to meet us! I remember Michael taking a snack while we were there and just being so upset with him and telling him no those snacks are for the invited kids. Looking back i think who cares that he took a snack, that is exactly why there were snacks, but after those first few disastrous attempts with church playgroups I was a bit wary. The kids, all the kids not just mine, were losing their crap at this meeting with the dentist. Luckily it was in the sanctuary of a church with a super deep baptismal font (yeah not luckily) so they were able to destroy quite a few items, but the moms were ok with it. Sure they did save a few lives and keep the kids from destroying the church too much but they were relaxed, some were even in sweatpants. We left that first meeting optimistic. We went to the easter egg hunt a few weeks later and that pretty much cemented us joining. We met a mom with three little boys who all went ballistic, met one of the members of the board who arrived late and was ok with it. All the people were friendly and remembered us, no one acted like they were too busy, or we were imposing. SO we joined. Sure over time the politics of the group made itself apparent, and yes there are days where people are less friendly than they should be (including us), but for the most part this has been great for us. You dont join something as lame as the MOMS Club unless your purpose is to make friends, after almost three years we have made friends, we enjoy the activities, and when we continue to fail at making friends at church that is ok.
The other day I dropped off a dinner (fail) to one of the members of the group that recently had a baby. When one of the members has a baby we send out a calendar and provide her family with dinner. I was so impressed at how quickly the calendar filled up- it took maybe two hours for seven slots to be filled. This isnt a group with a religious affiliation, without the group none of these people would have met but when they are asked to offer up service many respond right away. Granted no one wants to serve on the board but dinner after a baby- we got this. And it's refreshing. It's refreshing that there arent cliques (maybe there are and I'm oblivious), it's refreshing that the reason people are there is to be friends. It is just is, and may it is because I think making friends as a grown up is hard, and making friends with kids is even harder. So there's my rambling post. If for some reason you find yourself moving to a strange city and you are struggling to make friends join the MOMS Club. It sounds lame, but they will pull you out of your house and want to see you.
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