Moving to Portland
I've decided we are moving to Portland. That's right, Portland, Oregon. I should mention a few things, first, I have never actually been to Portland, in fact I think I've only met three people ever from Portland. Second, we are not actually moving to Portland. And finally, the only things I know about Portland I learned from the Wikipedia article. That's right.
So why Portland, well here's the thing, let me start by telling you that Texas is HOT in the summer. When you have an image of hell in your head... you should picture Texas in the summer. When the Renassiance painters were painting pictures of souls suffering in hell... this is what they were picturing... Texas is roughly the temperature of the sun... for 3-4 months a year. Ok maybe not that bad, but you understand that it is so dang hot here. Yes there are hotter places, but I don't live there. Ok so Portland has summer (at least according to the wikipedia article) but the highs... don't go over 100 for weeks at a time. SO number 1 reason the weather. Sure it rains, and it has cold days, but it also appears to have seasons.
Second reason, they have trees. Austin has... fake trees. Dallas had trees, but Austin has oaks (which are great) and cactus. Blah. According to the photos Portland has trees. Yay.
Third reason, no fire ants. I'm sure they have their own bugs, but let me just tell you friend, fire ants are the worst and they don't live there. Last night I went to turn off the hose and stepped in fire ants. my legs and feet look like I have some awful disease. I am growing an 11th toe and a 3rd kneecap.
Fourth, they have mountains, trees, and oceans (close enough) that don't require swimsuits.
Oh did I mention the sweaters. it seems like with the seasons, great weather and temperatures below boiling you could wear a sweater. I love sweaters.
So we are moving to Portland. Forget that Brian doesn't have a job there, that his company doesn't even have an office there, that houses are expensive there, that we don't know one single person there, that all my information comes from a wikipedia article, oh and that they just started building our house... we're moving to portland (not really, but doesn't it sound lovely?)
So why Portland, well here's the thing, let me start by telling you that Texas is HOT in the summer. When you have an image of hell in your head... you should picture Texas in the summer. When the Renassiance painters were painting pictures of souls suffering in hell... this is what they were picturing... Texas is roughly the temperature of the sun... for 3-4 months a year. Ok maybe not that bad, but you understand that it is so dang hot here. Yes there are hotter places, but I don't live there. Ok so Portland has summer (at least according to the wikipedia article) but the highs... don't go over 100 for weeks at a time. SO number 1 reason the weather. Sure it rains, and it has cold days, but it also appears to have seasons.
Second reason, they have trees. Austin has... fake trees. Dallas had trees, but Austin has oaks (which are great) and cactus. Blah. According to the photos Portland has trees. Yay.
Third reason, no fire ants. I'm sure they have their own bugs, but let me just tell you friend, fire ants are the worst and they don't live there. Last night I went to turn off the hose and stepped in fire ants. my legs and feet look like I have some awful disease. I am growing an 11th toe and a 3rd kneecap.
Fourth, they have mountains, trees, and oceans (close enough) that don't require swimsuits.
Oh did I mention the sweaters. it seems like with the seasons, great weather and temperatures below boiling you could wear a sweater. I love sweaters.
So we are moving to Portland. Forget that Brian doesn't have a job there, that his company doesn't even have an office there, that houses are expensive there, that we don't know one single person there, that all my information comes from a wikipedia article, oh and that they just started building our house... we're moving to portland (not really, but doesn't it sound lovely?)
At this point, we may join you. Hurray for AC
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